How to return to reality, improving your speech?

Socrates emphasized the greatness of the language with a capacious dictum: “Say something. I want to see you".

You probably know a metaphor with an ocean glacier, which has an outer cliff, impressive by itself precisely because the powerful base is hidden from the surface gaze.

The brutal obsession of fashion and its sharp changes lead us away from thoughtfulness and depth in the language. We glide, glide over the surface and only occasionally hold the essence on the lips ...

We suggest you dive with us into the vast expanses of the ocean and explore the implicit power of the glacier: let's figure out how to use everyday phrases and words more effectively. And on the program "Modern Rhetoric" you will master and learn how to use traditional and modern methods of rhetoric for speeches, presentations, video blogging, stand-ups and much more.
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5 ways to transform
We do not claim that it is strictly necessary to cut these designs out of your style, because everything is a language. Our goal is not to limit you, but to give you new opportunities for growth. We offer different variations of how to strengthen your speech and bring it closer to the psychic Absolute.

1
The ubiquitous question: "How are you?"
In 95% of everyday cases, the “how are you”, “how are you”, “what's new” patterns are idle talk and weaken the essence of our mind. All because these questions are immense and abstract. For the growth of our minds, point concentration and objectivity, the content of communication is extremely important.
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The uselessness of this structure is especially noticeable in Anglophones - they sometimes even do not wait for an answer from you and put in a turn from the existing language program: not to be silent, quicken and replace the broad with the primitive.

How to say differently:

What good have you had today?
What pleasant events happened to you this week?
What are your successes, discoveries in your business over the past month?
How is your speed reading training going? What did I discover from the beginning?
What are the 5 coolest tips you learned from the book you told me about last time?
I'm glad to see you! Let's structure what we will achieve today.
If you insert the phrase “how are you” into the conversation, then you should determine what exactly interests you in the interlocutor’s affairs. How are you doing: cross-stitching, relationships with parents, learning English?
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Of course, it is worthwhile to understand that the variations in the beginning of a conversation differ from the quality of relations between people and the goals of interaction.
2
Permission Requests
Here we mean the same phrases as “can I?”, “Can I?”, “Allow”, “allow”, “can you?”, “Could you?” etc. These pleas and appeals migrated to us from the European language and were successfully accepted by culture. Anyone who is even a little familiar with the syntax of English will confirm that such a statement of questions in a permissive way is the backbone of not only their spoken dialect, but also literary.

Interestingly, just a few decades ago, the word “please” was combined only with the imperative mood, according to the rules of pure Russian.

Compare phrases with a common meaning, but different forms:

“Please, could you help me out with dinner?”, “Can I contact you?”, “Can I have a glass of water, please?”
"Please help finish the dinner, I do not have time for the deadline", "Cyril, please be kind, take me a minute", "Do mercy, treat me with water, please."
Which of them breathe, and which are hung with too much uncertainty? In the first case, the appeal already contains some doubt about the friend's abilities. In the second case, the idea is the same, only we do not doubt, but give a specific message.

Be sure to note: the sign of the answer to the question is not psychologically important. We don’t press on a friend, we don’t owe anything to us, we only give an easy message to action without waiting for a result minus those cases in which we approved the rules in advance.

How to say differently:
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I will be very grateful if you would do this for me.
Please help me with this if you have the opportunity now.
I need your help in this and that.
I cannot do without your support in that.
Let's do something together.
What do you think if we do this and this shoulder to shoulder?
You can also beat the request with a joke, a clever statement that refers to a joint experience that unites you, warm feelings. For example: “I was touched by your past participation in organizing my concert. This time the guys are waiting for even more vigorous compositions ... Repeat? ” or "Well, what, ready to work for the good of the motherland?"

3
Abuse of the prefix "Not"
What do you think, why in the past confident users of figurative and living Old Slavonic (for information, it consisted of 49 letters) wanted to convey the idea mainly through the plus sign?

Here's the thing: it was believed that a negative pledge in appealing to the world around us forms a rejection of being, splits its unity into opposites.

I am glad that we have not lost this knowledge and now it can be found in the basic books on psychology, pedagogy, marketing, human resource management.

When we use a negative voice, the listener does not create an image of what needs to be done. On the contrary, confusion is created, because the prefix “not” forms a frail image and charges the word with rejection.

Illustrative examples:

"Do not fall, do not slip" or "Be careful, slippery."
“Do not distract me” or “Please let me concentrate.”
"Please do not put the cabinet here" or "There is no place for the cabinet, please put it in the far empty corner."
"Please do not forget to turn off the iron" or "The iron is left in the outlet, take care, please."
"Do not be sick" or "Be healthy."
By the way, Richard Bandler, co-author of work on neurolinguistic programming, in his classes liked to show merrily how a piece of “not” slows down thinking.

Present two stories:
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In the first, the dog chases the cat.
In the second - the dog does not chase the cat.
Where is everything quick and easy? And where do you have to bother with possible variations? In a negative pledge, you need to figure out how the poor fellow cat sits on a tree or a fence. And the dog guards him ... or maybe he doesn’t care about him, and he quietly eats up his lunch on his rug.

4
Misunderstanding the meaning of what you are talking about
“I envy you” or “I envy you in a good way” - you cannot envy in a good way. Envy is a great vice leading the brain to degradation; it is a derogatory manifestation of a person.

It is characterized as follows: the emergence of feelings of annoyance, bitterness, frustration with the achievements and successes of other people. This desire to possess the same, even if not ready for it. Friendliness is another matter; it is opposed to envy.

It’s better to say this: “You admire me with your results in sports and inspire me to practice more often to be cooler and stronger”, “I am very happy for you, you give cool results”, “It's great that you finally fulfilled your dream!”

Another example of the importance of the word form, but from the Soviet past: in sanatoria and hospitals, patients were called exclusively “recovering”, but not “sick”. Feel the difference: “Comrades recovering, time to go for a walk!” or "Comrades sick, it's time for the procedure!"

5
The words "Limiters"
What right do we have to doubt our abilities, and even more so our friends ’abilities:“ I can’t ”,“ You can’t ”,“ It's too hard ”,“ Then, now there’s no point in trying ”,“ We’ll try, but don’t the fact that it will come out, "" I don’t know how, "" This makes no sense, "" I'm tired, "" I'm not beautiful, "" I can’t do anything. "

Similar conditions are familiar to everyone. Is it worth considering that with this approach we fall into a vicious circle and the trap of one-sided thinking? The reaction to words and thoughts occurs immediately: the signal is centered in the primitive, reptilian part of the brain and fixed there. Further, the effect disperses throughout the body, the hormonal system releases substances corresponding to the command issued to it. If "I am sad and sick," then this is one quality of the substance. If "I am easy and cheerful" - then another.

Moreover, all that has been said and heard over life does not go anywhere, but is forever recorded in the unconscious, in the unlimited section of our essence. As proof: almost any information can be extracted from the brain at any time by either direct or indirect exposure. This may be hypnosis, a transcendental experience of meditation, or machine influence on critical parts of the brain.

This is where our strong and weak habits flow. Let’s understand that each phrase expressed has its own value, its own intention.

Summarize
The insignificantly fast pace with which civilization absorbs and produces, pumps up mental rush and upsets the balance of thoughts. We should stop more often and seize the moment.

We are not perfect, everyone has burning pains in the past, so in the present moment our speech is partially covered by flaws. A person does not say this because of a bad one, but because of the weakness of the mind.

Train your sharpness of mind and take care of heartfelt joy, and then observations of the bad and the good will disappear as unnecessary, since purity will be on an instinctive level.